The Bane of Technology

Ok, so here's a new rant. Basically I pretty much virtually live on my laptop (which is a Macbook Pro - I have a love/hate relationship with it). Now with my current lifestyle, I can readily access everything on my laptop, except when it gets all funny with me and decides not to work for me anymore. Today (which is Sunday 19th July 2015) I encountered so many problems with my Macbook that I had had enough and decided to restore its factory settings.

It's a pain, I know, but it worked. The issue that I was mainly encountering was resolved and now I can use the Macbook in peace...however, that's not half the problem. After resetting everything, and re-downloading all the applications and documents I once owned, I had problems with the hard drive I saved all my files on...you see, I needed to log onto a certain app to gain access to the sheet music I'd been working on (yes you'll be hearing more from me soon), and all my passwords had been saved onto that hard drive. Unfortunately my Macbook froze on me so I had to restart EVERYTHING, but that's not the problem. You see when I restarted everything, I guess during that process the hard drive said "You know what, screw it. I'm gonna screw you over, because I am too old for this s**t" (I don't swear), and all the documents, spreadsheets and basically anything to do with everything in my virtual life was ERASED! Granted I could have tried to get them back, but they were in code or something - I had to open up terminal to reset the programmes and whatnots but I'm not that computer savvy to figure it out. Anyway, so I had to basically delete the mumbo jumbo that my hard drive threw in my face, and pretty much re-create everything. Now because it's late (when I wrote this post) and my dad's using the main computer, I can't really re-download everything, so I have to start ALL OVER AGAIN! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH OF A PAIN THAT IS!!!

Oh and I forgot to mention, because I restarted my Mac, I had to re-download the Microsoft Office programmes I once had on it. The only problem is it needs a product activation key to actually activate it. Now that's not the only problem I had, you see the product key I have is apparently "not valid" and I scoured the Microsoft website only to find that the reason why it's not valid is because the servers are down...well isn't that peachy...WHAT THE F**K IS THIS!!!! I need my Microsoft Word, Excel and whatever else I use to get this blog going!!! I am so not in the mood for this! No Microsoft, get your S**T together and let me use your products! I paid good money for it! I am not about to let you ruin the one constant in my electronic life just because you lot couldn't keep your cool!

Ugh...besides that...I finally have Final Cut Pro up and working again, and not using up the entire space of my Mac's flash drive (no thank you Apple), and now I can work on this second video that I've been trying to get done for the past week. I think I've found out the best way to record this video, because there is no way I'm going through 4 hours of making a house only to find the recordings incompatible with Final Cut Pro/Sony Vegas. All of this mechanical malfunction is giving me a migraine! so that's it...I'm not going to say any more, because if I do, I probably will end up a sobbing mess wondering what I'm going to do with my life.

So in ol' Feather Charm style. This is Feather Charm signing out!

Feather's Music Track 6 - Father I Place Into Your Hands

I just realised, I could easily post up the same songs and stuff here so, yeah...for those who don't want to see Feather's Charm here's the post for the "newest" song I've written:

Hello everyone,

It’s been a while since I checked up on my Music! The truth is I’ve been so backlogged with other stuff; I’ve not had time to release all the new songs I’ve been working on. So this next one is a hymn. I’ve been working on it for some time, and now’s a good time to release it. Although I think I could have done better, I still like it, and maybe in the future I’ll release a new version.

Ok, so what’s the reason behind this one? Well, at first it was challenge for me. You see, I got so used to listening to it being played and sung badly that I just can’t see any way to redeem it. However, I did the best I could, so please welcome, “Father I Place Into Your Hands”. Ok, so the second reason why I’m uploading this, instead of the one for my video (You’ll know if you’ve seen A Modern Bungalow), is because I’ve just gone through a really rough lesson. I’m currently still in the process of reflecting and learning from this lesson and I felt the need to remind myself, it’s not about me. It’s what God wants to do for me. I’m sure, with his guidance I’ll get through this without hurting any more people than I already have. Plus, as I was trying to drag myself out of the muddy pit I’d fallen into, I read a picture post on Facebook that pretty much told me to always thank God, no matter what.

I know he’s helped me through this, in the advice I’d received upon seeking it, and I am grateful he’s chosen to help me in that way. So, regardless of whether or not this hymn is what I’d like it to be, I know he’ll forgive me for my shortcomings, and his infinite grace will make it even better.

So without further ado, here is “Father I Place Into Your Hands”.

Father I Place Into Your Hands - SoundCloud

If you want to check out the sheet music, that made this piece, click here:

Father I Place Into Your Hands

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Lyrics by Jenny Hewer

Father I place into your hands,

the things I cannot do,

Father I place into your hands,

the things that I've been through,

Father I place into your hands,

the way that I should go,

For I know I always can trust you

V

Father I place into your hands,

my friends and family,

Father I place into your hands,

the things that trouble me,

Father I place into your hands,

the person I would be,

For I know, I always can trust you.

V

Father, we love to see your face,

we love to hear your voice,

Father, we love to sing your praise,

and in your name rejoice,

Father, we love to walk with you,

and in your presence rest,

For we know, we always can trust you.

V

Father I want to be with you,

and do the things you do,

Father I want to speak the words,

that you are speaking too,

Father I want to love the ones,

that you will draw to you,

For I know that I am one with you.

So what do you think? Let me know in the comments below, and I'll see you next week with another arrangement.

I Am Tired Of Being Backwards

Ok, so hey! No I'm not a different person, I just wanted everything to be in one place so I don't have to keep logging out and logging back in again, just to write these posts and be on blogger at the same time. This is still Feather Charm, but on a different account so yeah...

Anyway, what is this thing about? Well, I've just recently discovered I'm pretty much backwards, because I'm not really keeping up with everything. I mean, I haven't been on League of Legends for a while, why? Because I keep travelling and working on my blog, I don't have enough time to just play! I know it's all my fault really, but the thing is, I'd rather be out of tune with the world and be in tune with me. There are a lot of things happening in my life: my cousin's graduation, the upcoming League of Legends World Championship Series (that's happening in September...I think...the reason why it's in my life is because I want to watch it), and my last year of university is coming up soon too. I have so many things that's going on, I don't know where to look...so what do I do? I immerse myself in my blog and website, because it's the only way I can cope.

I'm not joking, most of my days now are spent just editing posts, making pages and making new content for the website. I know I should really take it easy but there's just no way I can, because I'd rather get the views on there. I'd really like to have some sort of base going, I mean, I do have quite a bit of stuff on there anyway, but I just don't seem to be getting the views I want, I know I should promote it, but I have no money and the job I do have only pays for travel expenses and I use that money to buy essential stuff I do use! Oh and get this, if I want to buy something online, I have to ask my mother first! There's just nothing I can really do! I have to just rely on the fact that someone in my circle will actually see them and promote it for me...but I know that's not going to happen, because who would want to see a blog/website made by a busybody like me?

Not to mention I have several YouTube channels that I'm going to be linked with (because one's for my website, and the other is a a joint venture), so I'm going to have to promote them...is it just too much to ask for people to look! I don't have much in terms of social skills, but when it comes to being online and getting my opinions out there, I feel a lot safer. However, just like in real life, I'm still being ignored! Maybe I'm thinking too much about this...yes I am thinking too much about this, but the truth is I really just want some recognition! No one really listens to me (except the one person who actually does), the people I try to help, don't even notice that I am doing my best to help them, and I just feel like a hermit because people don't understand that I too need some love! I mean, yes, I get love from my family (immediate family, that is), but from anywhere else? Nope! I mean even here, no one really comments, nor on my website (which I have linked to on this blog), I've no real support on this platform, and it's been what, four, five years? Since I started this blog? I'm just getting so tired of being lonely!

Do you know why I started this blog? I started because a few of my friends had introduced me to blogger, I thought, it's a good way to get opinions out there, so why not try it. Initially it was just meant to be for things like...I don't know...pictures I tried to make on Photoshop (which didn't quite work out), then I tried to make stories, but because I gave up on them, I didn't finish. Now I only use it to simply shout and rant, and pretty much let out the frustration and anger I feel, not just at others, but at myself too. I mean I pretty much just bad-mouth myself here day in and day out, because I don't have confidence in myself. I don't have that reassurance that everything is ok.

And although I have my faith to fall back on, I just feel like it's an excuse, just to say to God, do whatever you want with me, I'm done. I mean, yes I'm trying to do His work, to carry out his mission, but I just feel like no one is really listening. It's like this...I do something, I find it difficult and I get through it, with His help. When I get out at the other end, I look back just to see if anything really happened. I mean, I've built the path, but no one seems to want to take it and join me on the other side, and I look to him and ask, but I just find myself alone, and wondering if I should go back down that path just to ask him, but I keep hearing him telling me to go forward.

Ugh...ok so while I was writing that, I realised, I just gave myself the answer, and that was an example of that anecdote, and once I publish this post, I'm going to keep refreshing my stats page just to see if anyone actually reads this stuff, and I know I'll be getting loads of views, but no one will really comment. I know that. So whatever.

This is Feather Charm, signing off.

Revival of Updates Abducted Whatnots

Hello everyone! (Oh god! Feather's invaded!) Anyway, so, I've found a new purpose for this blog. Yes there may be some traffic from Feather's website, but this blog will basically be the little diary I started it out to be. I think that would be best, that way, I won't have to overload Feather with all this negativity, because right now, I do feel a little bit negative.

Anyway...so there's been a lot of development since I moved to Feather's Charm. First, there's just so many things to modify on that website, this blog is really simple and I prefer it to that one! It's so simple! Second, I've started so many projects that I literally have no time for myself, but I guess that's a good thing, because if I did have a lot of time to myself, I'd probably get depressed and angry at myself for not doing anything with my life. Seriously that happens.

So what happened with this website? Well, don't get me wrong, it's just a lot of stuff goes on there, that I'm starting to go insane! So many things to add, to change, to remove, it's crazy! I'd love to just stick with this blog, but I kinda want that structure WordPress has (no offence Blogger) it's just so easy to use, plus I discover more every week, when I work for the Codpast! It's awesome! So, I'm sorry but I'll be sticking with that website.

As for the projects stuff, well...for those of you who've stuck with me all these years I'm grateful, but if you're just getting here now, be grateful you didn't have to go through the phases I went through to get to this point. Ok, so, a little background. Last year, I found myself getting depressed so much so I couldn't stop crying for nearly three days. I was so bummed out that I didn't have a boyfriend and everyone else around me did, and that's why I'm working hard to keep myself busy. I don't ever want to feel like that ever again, so I've pushed it to the back of my mind, and I'm doing everything I can to  ignore it. Although, I know many of you will think that it's not a good thing. But that's the thing. If I don't ignore it, I'll be the crybaby I don't ever want to be...ok, let me ask you this, would you rather a friend who is strong and keeps on with life, or someone who constantly relies on you for comfort? I'd rather be strong!

So what projects have I got? Well there's the website (which is great, but also a nightmare). I've got several YouTube channels lined up for myself, but I might quit a few of them, because of reasons (which I will not discuss here)...OH! I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT MY STORY!!!! Yes that is still going on, and no I will not be sharing it on Feather's Charm. I think, I'll stick with my roots, and stick it up here! You know, it all started here, it will end here...well, I won't say end, but...you guys know. You all know me! Anyway...Yes I'm still working on that novel, but it's taking longer than usual because of what I've got lined up for my life basically. Oh and I've actually started a scrapbook! Yes a scrapbook...just because!

I haven't quite finished decorating it yet, but I will...I like how the map is behind the book...because it is a scrapbook of all the stuff I got when I was out of the country. I started it when I went to Prague, because I thought, since my sister isn't using her scrapbook, I might as well set an example (although she does have time to draw...which she could do in her one if she wanted)...but I highly doubt she'll follow it, so oh well. It's my personal project. I don't care!

So, that's it. I'll see you lot later!